If you and your husband live a tumultuous life and divorce seems
to be the best solution not only for you, but also for your kids, it should be
entered into with a clear head, a good lawyer and a willingness to be fair. Divorce
can be a debilitating experience. If you think you had trouble just arguing
over the bills before, you are now in for a fight. It is the kids up on the
block. You are full of fear. Who are they going to choose? Are they going to
suffer? Are they going to be scarred? One thing for sure, they will never
forget it. Divorce is just the toughest thing for a child and the ones who
suffer most are the children who struggle to understand why this is happening
to them. They love both their parents; they don’t want to be separated. They
don’t want to favor one parent over the other. The family structure has been
interfered with. Against this backdrop, their interests and welfare should be
considered and come first.
The amicable way forward
1
This is going to be a tough one, but first you have to
decide who the children are going to be with.
2
Discuss week-end arrangements and school holidays and
religious holidays and Christmas and come to an agreement as far as how long
the children can be with the non-custodial parent during school breaks and
holidays.
3
Make sure you state in writing what times the children
are to be picked up; this can become problematic if it is not addressed.
4
Get out your laptop and list the children’s expenses:
clothing, money for school projects, groceries, doctor appointments, school trips,
school fees, allowances, and a small sum for contingencies.
5
Discuss how the children are to be brought up as far as
religion and culture. There are dietary laws, personal belief, and religious
holidays that have to be respected.
6
There is nothing wrong going to your places of worship
with the children. Bible study and study of other books are good for children.
By the time a child reaches three and four he should know who he is.
7
Discuss the college you both want them to attend and
meet with the principal. Don’t bring a new partner along.
8
Agree on the kind of punishment the children are to
receive when they step out of line and stick with what you have decided.
9
In the event of an emergency decide who should be
called if the two of you can’t be found, and provide telephone numbers.
10
Pick a lawyer, both of you, who can protect the
interests of your children.
No comments:
Post a Comment