Feb 2, 2012

Should there be no Higher Power?

If there were no religion, there would be no God, nothing to cling to in times of need. The world would be in chaos. Chaos would bring with it tyranny and war. There would be no hope. Without hope, you have despair. There would be nothing to live for. There would be nothing to aspire to. There would be nothing feeding our spiritual being. We need religion because we need God. Living without God would be like walking a tight rope without a safety net. We need that net, even if we don’t need it for ourselves but for the survival of others.

Without religion, the world would be a sorry place and there would be no order. Without order, there would be no morality. Without the breath of God in us, we would be empty shells. If you asked ten people to describe God, the descriptions would all be different, but the meanings would be the same – which is that we all need a just and moral system to live by. Some might say that they have their own moral system and don’t need God – and that religion causes more harm than good if one looks at all the wars and atrocities perpetrated on people because of religion. It could be, but it is caused by man, and not by God.

I have three atheist friends and I admire them when I hear them speak. They are so convincing and compelling in their arguments. They absolutely do not have a need for a God, they say, and have made it through life on their own. Really? What about a mother who has prayed for them and God answered her prayers? Is that not from God? Even in our ignorance, God would rise up in our hearts and come to our aid. I am envious of these atheist friends because they do not believe that this is also a belief.

Belief is much more than doctrine. One just simply cannot live without God; even if God only resides in a corner of your heart. In the Holy Qur’an, God says, I am closer to you than your jugular vein. Indeed. We feel happy and protected when we believe in God, and that feeling of goodness and wellbeing is contagious. God is a constant. Maybe you would not have known the difference between right and wrong if there had not been religion. Maybe your parents would not have treated you with the kindness and love they did if they themselves did not have God in their life. Any religion is better than no religion as religion creates fellowship and through fellowship we receive love. Can we live without love? If you answer no to that question, you answer yes to loving God.

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Is it always the guy's fault?

Every day we see Dr Phil with a couple on the stage taking someone to task and more often than not, it is the guy’s fault. Dr Phil gives the ex-lover the list. He has to do more to accept the stepdaughter he has inherited when he married the girl’s mother; he has to take more responsibility for his new family, he is older and has to rise above himself and behave like an adult. All the time the wife sits like a demure little angel watching her husband squirm in his seat. She does not show the mean little smile she would give him if they were at home. To be sure, Dr Phil is a big lug and no one argues with him. He is fair and gives the female in the situation her due share of blame if she deserves it. Still, coming back to the original question, don’t women contribute more than they are accused of?

Things women will do when jilted

·                    Pick up her girlfriend, do a stake-out near his house and follow him secretively in the car.
·                    When she locates him, she loses control and lashes out, accusing him of cheating on her. A fight ensues and she does not care if she knocks him down with her car. Both end up getting charged and spend the night in the slammer.
·                    Go to the man’s place of employment and tell his employer what kind of person he is and makes a big row; the man gets fired.
·                    Follow him to his apartment and insist on talking to him. Okay, men do that too, but don’t resort to telling the police that he said he was going to kill her.
·                    Turn up at the ex-lover’s engagement or wedding ceremony and make a scene.
·                    Burn or cut his clothes because she suspects that he has a woman on the side.
·                    Punish an ex-husband by withholding the kids and not letting him see them.
·                    Kidnap her kids and swoop off with them to the motherland and not feel guilty about doing so. No one knows the plight of an unhappy single mother with kids in a foreign country better than this writer who was in an airport scene.
·                    Hit the ex-lover with a pan on his head, and the girlfriend too, when she breaks down his door to come and collect her goods.
·                    Drum up false charges when she can’t get what she wants.

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Falling in love in your sixties

Possibly, people who would be most drawn to reading this article would be those who have themselves been married and divorced, gone down the aisle of depression, discovery, and then recovery, and have no real interest in being married again. But what about those ones who still believe in love and are very much interested in having a mate at sixty and upwards? Is falling in love at sixty-five or sixty-nine a preposterous idea? Should it be dismissed by family members because they find it ridiculous? To this question, you have an immediate answer; that at sixty you no longer have to get anyone’s permission.

Five key benefits of finding love in your sixties

·                    In your sixties the criteria for marriage would be different than when you were in your twenties. It is less about sex and more about intimacy. It is about sharing and companionship. It is about enjoying the spoils of all those hard years you had to provide for a young family. It is about sitting back and saying, here, God, I tried my best for my family and thank you for this second chance.
·                    Because it is less about sex and more about intimacy, you are more interested in the quietness of life and living in the moment. Your needs are different, you are more accepting. You don’t need to bounce off the wall with excitement. A long leisurely walk will provide the same pleasure as making love because life has calmed you down and you are interested in different things.
·                    Having a mate keeps you on your toes as far as your hygiene – yes, hygiene – and as far as keeping yourself healthy, attractive, interested in life, and grateful to God for getting a chance to try again. Few people have good second chances; some have none.
·                    You can see and love your grandchildren and do interesting things with them, and then take them home when you have had enough.
·                    You don’t have to sit on a park bench by yourself feeling lonely and finally have a sidekick with the same experience and needs, both physical and emotional, as you. You don’t always agree on everything, but have agreed to be agreeable about things that are important to both of you.
·                    For this writer, who has signed up three times, she still loves the notion of a momma and a poppa bear in the house, and happily acknowledges that she can’t be good at all things. She envies people who get it right the first time.

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