Nov 28, 2012

Being jilted might be your best wedding present

It is bad enough when someone breaks up with you after a long courtship but what about that relationship where the couple decides to get married, saves up for years, spends three hundred thousand on an African themed destination wedding and on the day of the nuptials the bride stands with her toes in the sand and her heart in her shoes crying for the groom who never arrives? This kind of rejection probably ranks as one of the most painful and embarrassing things that can happen. There is no pill for it, only the one that is hard to swallow. Nothing can take away the hurt; nothing. The act begs so many questions: why did it happen? – wasn’t she good enough? – wasn’t she exciting enough? Was he drunk when he made the proposal? What was she going to do now?

Hard pill to swallow
As hard, humiliating and unbelievable as this may sound you may not have been ready for marriage and God intervened and is giving you more time to think. You are finding out stuff now rather than later and have been spared a life of uncertainty.  You can unravel the threads that held the relationship together and make better choices. This is a chance for you to think – that maybe this was not the right relationship for you and while you may suffer the brunt of gossip for a while, in the long run you will benefit and find the right man. Perhaps, deep down inside you, you knew the relationship had a loose thread or two, but dismissed it. 

Warning voice
We all know that warning voice and do nothing about it. Maybe the benefit for you will be the act of forgiveness, where you learn your life lessons and eventually forgive him. And maybe he is not the right man for you to marry but the right man for a friend. Good friends are as hard to find as good marriage material. To end off, God works in strange ways. He may use a beggar to bring a rich man to your door, or bring a rich man who is poor and eventually marries your daughter. God is the Master Planner and the Architect of our lives. Lessons come to us in many different ways. We just have to be open to receive them. Being jilted is not the end of the world, but a sure way to jolt you back to life and do what you do best; live and learn.