What would
you do if your six-year-old daughter comes home crying from school and tells
you that a boy tried to pull down her pants? Would you be calm on hearing the
news? Would you be mad at the boy? Would you be afraid that your daughter might
have been compromised? What would you do and how would you go about it?
No malicious intent
The answers
would very much depend on WHAT EXACTLY the boy did, whether he had malicious
intent, whether he was forced to do it as part of the game, or a number of
other reasons. There are many running games for kids to play – one of them
called tag – where you have to run after the kids and catch them. Was this
something innocent like that? Six-year-old kids can be naughty, but calling them
malicious is hardly fair. Accidents happen. You can chase a boy and catch him
by his belt and the pants come off, or you want to frighten a girl by pulling
on her pants. It is not good manners, for sure, and not polite but it does not
warrant a harsh sentence. The answer would be deep down in the boy’s brain, but
is he even old enough to understand what this means?
Asking the right questions after an
incident of suspected abuse
·
I would ask
my daughter to tell me what happened, and not to leave out important details.
·
I would call
the police and tell them what happened.
·
I would
contact a social worker to tell me my rights and also to talk to my daughter.
·
I would not
rush out to the boy's family home and create a scene.
·
I would ask
for contact details of bystanders and witnesses and give it to the police.
·
I would get
in touch with Child Services and speak to a social worker to see if my child
has been abused.
·
I would ask
a doctor to meet with my daughter to determine that she is fine and whether the
incident is serious enough to warrant therapy.
·
The most
important question I would want to have answered, however, is whether my child
has been touched in an inappropriate way or not so as the appropriate measures
can be taken and life can go on.
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