Preparing your toddler for a sibling

If you are pregnant with your second child and your toddler is starting to get jealous, this is something you should take cognizance of and deal with early. If you are fatigued now, you will be more fatigued when the new baby arrives and it will help you enormously if you plan a new schedule ahead of time. Here are some quick and easy ways to prepare and introduce your toddler to the sibling which is due any day.

Rearrange your priorities

·                    Make a grocery list for one month’s food and other supplies and call in the order so you don’t need to leave the house;

·                    Rearrange your toddler’s play dates and other activities to accommodate the new baby in the house;

·                    Order diapers and wipes in bulk as you are going to need them for a long time;

·                    Spend enough time with your toddler as you want to avoid jealousy;

·                    While you are still pregnant introduce the subject of a new sibling so that by the time the baby is born it is not a shock;

·                    Let dad have a special bonding session with her by taking her out on his own;

·                    It is important not to neglect your daughter at this time; show her the items you have bought for the baby. Let her choose some of the bonnets and bootees and show her the christening dress you have bought. Tell her the dress is extra special as she had worn it first;

·                    Discuss some of the names you may wish to consider for the new infant; don’t leave her out of things. Remember, she was the first on the scene;

·                    Ask her how she feels about sharing a room with the baby or whether she wants to be on her own, and then give her a chance to express how she thinks the new room should look;

·                    When the baby arrives, don’t make a huge fuss and don’t forget to include her in everything;

·                    Sit up close with her on the bed and the infant so she can feel part of the process when the baby is being fed – and let her touch the new baby;

·                    Spend enough alone time with your toddler and don’t make a huge fuss of the new arrival. Your toddler needs time to come to terms with what is happening.

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Is it fair to expect your partner to live without sex?

If you’ve been happily married for ten or more years, and your life is suddenly disrupted as a result of an accident or illness where you will spend most of your time in a wheelchair or bed, what do you do if it hurts the other person to have sex? What if it’s awkward and painful and the person does not feel like it? Do you expect it? Do you force it? Do you live without it? Should your partner have sex outside the home? Or have sex with a stranger with your permission? What is the protocol?

Going to the heart of the matter

There is nothing that can replace intimacy between a couple who has been in love for years. Intimacy is not the same as sex although it is a combination of understanding and love. When you have understanding and compassion, when you love a person and feel and want the best for them, and are used to your quiet moments where it is just the two of you, there is a lot one can do if one is genuinely concerned. Sex is not only about the body; it is to a large extent, the brain, intimate conversation, a loving touch, and yes, doing what you can to bring your partner to a climax.

The brain is the real sex organ. It is where lovemaking begins, in the head. You do not suddenly stop loving someone because he or she has had an accident – unless you had no intention of having a lasting relationship. Here are some things you can do.

·                    Always smell nice. Don’t stop wearing your favorite perfume. Be fresh and squeaky clean even though you are in bed.

·                    Wear nice clothes in the house and get rid of that old cardigan that you wear when you feel sorry for yourself.

·                    If you are a kisser, this is the time to get creative. You know what your partner wants.

·                    Play your favorite music and go down memory lane.

·                    Hold hands whenever you can to let your partner know that things have not changed.

·                    Tell him you love him when he least expects it.

·                    If you are ill, but still able to walk, do as much as you can in the house.

·                    Discuss the possibility of trying new techniques you are comfortable with.

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Fun activities the whole family can enjoy

Family fun works at its best when there is something in it for everyone. Whether it is winter or summer, there are the museums to visit and the dinosaurs; you are getting fresh air traveling back and forth, but spending time indoors as well as outdoors. It is beneficial for some of your activities to take into account spending time outdoors and getting some Vitamin D protection; also good for fresh air to get into the lungs. If there are three kids who all have their own ideas, sit down with mom and dad at the table to decide where to go.

Outdoor activities with benefits

·                    The zoo is always good as kids love animals and parents are curious and have fun too. Do not feed the animals as they will overfeed; they might also lash out at you through the metal bars. It is a good activity as you walk around to the different pens and get exercise and fresh air. Bonus for parents? Yes, the kids will be tired when they get home and will have a good night’s sleep.

·                    Another outdoor activity if there is fresh snow is to put on your all-weather jacket and build a snowman together. Mom and dad can participate. You can throw snow balls at one another.

·                    The family can go together to the skating rink and have fun. They will meet their friends on the frozen rink and have time to spend some time together as most times during snowy weather people stay indoors.

·                    If the weather is cold, but not snowing yet, the family can also go for a walk. Stay away from frozen-over lakes where there are iffy patches and you might crack the surface of the ice and fall in.

·                    Go surfing down the hill if there is enough snow and your parents allow it.

Indoor activities with benefits

There are enough indoor activities the whole family can enjoy and ones you probably have already incorporated into your life:

1                    Do you have a movie night where the children can pick the movie and the kids help you make the popcorn? If you haven’t done this already, select a night where you will regularly turn up and watch a film the whole family can enjoy.

2                    Play a computer game or a board game everyone can participate in. To avoid your kids playing too many computer games, set a time limit of one or two hours, and then switch it off.

3                    Pack a great picnic lunch with roast chicken and salad and have a treat eating in the park. Don’t throw the chicken bones around; some dog will snatch it up and the bones might get stuck in his throat.

4                    Go for rides at the local fair in summer and choose rides which are safe for kids your age. Accompany your kids on these rides.

5                    Throw a Frisbee in the park and let the dog be part of it.

6                    Go together to church; a family who prays together stay together.

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