Preparing to return to Canada

After returning home to South Africa in 1994 after 27 years in Toronto, I am going back to Canada and the US after spending 19 years in South Africa. It was a hard decision to make, but my responsibilities to my parents have ended as they are both deceased and I now want to be with my daughter, Zaida Harry, in New Jersey and forge a new life with her and her family. My grandchildren Ameera and Zara are waiting anxiously for my arrival, but having just made the decision to return to North America where I have lots of friends from my Canadian days there is much to do before I can get on a plane. The thought that I will be with them soon is exciting. They are both at a great age, one and a half years old and three-and-a half, I can relive some of my childhood with them.

Preparation for trip

·         Write to Canada Health and reinstate my Canadian health card

·         Get new passport photos for my Canadian passport

·         Write to Motor Vehicles in Canada and reinstate my driver’s licence

·         List and sell my Plumstead house

·         Sell my motor vehicle

·         Prepare my receipts for tax preparation

·         Speak to my sister for her accountant’s details so my Canadian tax can be prepared

·         Speak to realtor

·         What to do with books

·         What to pack for container

·         Home Affairs

·         Contact bank

·         Book tickets to Toronto

·         Publication of new book

·         Meeting with publishers

·         Contact National Arts Council

Making the decision to return

I cried bitterly yesterday when I made the decision to leave, but once I make a big decision like that I stick with it. The time has arrived for me finally to have both my kids and grandchildren in the same country and to enjoy the rest of my life. My grand-kids are at a great age and I am looking forward to Halloweens, skating and baseball games. Coming back to South Africa was the best thing I did. I got to know my country through research and writing. My dual lifestyle, however, now require that I join up with my family. Thank you, South Africa, and to all of you who have contributed to my happiness and success.  I am busy writing my personal experience living with Parkinson’s. We will still know each other through my forthcoming books if God so wishes for me to be here.

http://www.raydajacobs.blogspot.com

Parkinson's linked with constipation

Living with Parkinson’s can be easy at times or quite difficult, depending on your attitude and how you view the disease and your time on earth. There is no doubt that living with the disease is difficult. I was diagnosed with Parkinson’s a year ago. It was a huge shock for me as a writer and surely put my life in perspective.  Surprisingly, my right hand trembles less now than before and trembling is slight, but I now also rock myself back and forth while I write which gives me some kind of comfort. 

Content and structure

 I use my daily articles to monitor whether I can still write content and structure a book, whether an article is taking longer to get written, whether I struggle for words, whether I lose a writing thread and cannot connect again. I am willing to admit that I now take fifteen minutes or more of my usual time to structure and write a paragraph of this size. If the above makes sense and is error-free, I can only say thank you to God who gives me the wherewithal to continue writing. I am monitoring my own level of progress and am happy to report that I can still make sense on the page. As long as that happens I will write.

Monitoring the stages

No two days are the same when you are a Parkinson’s sufferer. You might feel great one day and lousy the next; each day is different. Just a few days earlier I had a back-breaking incident with constipation where I did not have a bowel movement for several days. The tears rolled out of my eyes, my backside hurt, and I could not do anything except push. For four hours I struggled and by the time the doctor arrived I was lying on my stomach on the bed, gasping. Parkinson’s is known for causing constipation; check with your doctor and take the right natural medicine.  No two days with Parkinson’s is the same; you may wake up in the morning and feel happy with your life or you may wake up depressed. Consult a doctor for the best advice.

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Can you ever forgive a pedophile?

Never, ever; not under any circumstance can you forgive someone who has molested and destroyed your child. Raping a young girl is a serious crime. When you rape and murder a child you destroy an entire family and perform an act that even the most hardened of criminals would find hard to do.  Why, then should you forgive your perpetrator? Why should you have mercy when he had lust and raped your child? We are forgiving a lot of people who have hurt us and who don’t have any concept of decency. The answer, plain and simple is that unless you deal with what has happened to you and your family that you will live with the problem forever and never return to your life. 

Supreme forgiveness

Unfortunately, sometimes we have to do things that make no sense whatsoever, but are necessary for survival and the greater good of all down the line. An example of supreme forgiveness would be what the South African President Nelson Mandela did in 1992. Mandela forgave his white masters and those who had enslaved him, and changed the world by forgiving a nation and not taking revenge.  Revenge would have been harder on the country. He was smart and showed the world how to turn the other cheek. Because of that the transition from one government to another was easier. South Africans never did negotiate with American superstars on White House lawns; they did it themselves.

Forgiveness to heal

When it comes to forgiveness you can take a leaf out of Mandela’s book. There is no one in the world with Mandela’s largesse, wisdom and generosity. Are you able to forgive the man or the neighbor who raped your child? Can you be THAT forgiving? Again, the answer is an uncomfortable yes; it would be hard to forgive a pedophile no matter who spoke for him. Do not beat yourself up if you cannot forgive. Rape and murder are not forgivable crimes. You can forgive a 12-year old for getting a girl of the same age pregnant and it would be terrible and no less wrong, but no mother can see her girl raped and killed and be expected to forgive – not in the foreseeable future, and not for a very long time.  

http://www.raydajacobs.blogspot.com