Feb 18, 2012

Writing your way to a best seller


It can be more than a dream; it can become a reality. No matter what your state of mind or experience about writing, everyone has at least one book in him to make that dream come true. Aspiration starts with desire, curiosity, interest. You have read a book and have been blown away about how the story was told and the sheer beauty of the arrangement of words. Or you have seen something or heard something that you want to capture and remember, and so the pen comes out. Do not doubt that you can write; there are different kinds of writing. If you can write a verse for a Hallmark card or send a handwritten note to invite someone to dinner, you can write.


Ideas to incorporate in your daily writing


·                    If you have something to write about, start right away and do not worry what the character is up to. Let the character run wild on the page; later on you will reel the character in and give it substance and develop it. Your writing at this stage should be free and anything at all you want to write about. Aspiring writers who want to do a short story right away should do it anyway just to get it out of the system and to enjoy the fun of writing. Writing for the most part for most people can become difficult and confusing because you are attempting too many things at the same time. Still, the idea is to write and to love writing.

·                    The best way to get experience is to write snippets when you start out; short little vignettes of an event you have witnessed or been part of. This does two things; if the event was traumatic, writing about it is helpful, it is also a place where you can put a little plot together and give it a suitable ending. Vignettes and postcard stories work on the following principle: an inciting incident, resolve the problem, and get out. Read lots and lots of short story collections and anthologies to see what the writer does. 

·                    Have a favorite place to write where it is out of the way of other members of the household and take an hour or more every day to write. This exercise is valuable because if you have the makings of a writer and the writing bug starts to get you, you are on your way. Don’t even begin to think of techniques of writing and composition and grammar. Don’t let your left brain interfere when you are busy creating. You have a lifetime ahead of you. Don’t force things onto the page. Ideas will come to you. You will suddenly find yourself getting the urge to write. Don’t make the mistake thinking that using big words will impress anyone. Just sit back for a moment and think of all those luscious things in the back of your mind; they’re all small words.

·                    This writer started at age twelve. A few books were published – historical fiction in South Africa – and then the big one, Confessions of a Gambler. It resulted in several awards, both in book form and in film, but as I am writing to you now, I am still in my favorite spot writing, writing and writing. Yes, I am an addict. And yes, you will be back to read more about the process of writing. You don’t learn it in one book and in one year; you spend a lifetime getting it right, and you have to keep writing and reading – if only to learn more about yourself.



Feb 17, 2012

Secrets for a happy marriage



Marriage worked better in the fifties and sixties than it does today because as women became more educated about their rights and their abilities, they became stronger and more confident and some things in the marriage took a back seat to other things and before you knew it, more and more couples split and soon there was a generation of single parents and the picture changed. Couples can get that picture back if they are prepared to work at it. There is nothing like having a great family; a poppa bear, a momma bear, and a cub. 


The old-fashioned way



This article will have little or nothing to do with sex; how to have it, how to serve it up, how to have more sex and less Monopoly. This is about taking the best of what you have gleaned over the years and applied it to your marriage. Whether you are male or female, both of you can benefit by the following tips. 


·                    If you know that your partner likes tea or coffee first thing in the morning, prepare it and give it to him as he prepares to get up. Your partner will like that you are concerned, and it will give the giver a nice warm feeling.

·                    Do some of the things you did at the beginning of your marriage where you woke up the family and had big fluffy pancakes and waffles ready. Remember a sure way to get to your mate’s heart is through his stomach.

·                    If you are at home and not working outside the home, make sure his shirts are dry cleaned and where they should be; in the closet.

·                     Go to a small cinema for an art house movie and have popcorn and hold hands.

·                    When you are in the garden, call your wife on her cell in the house and ask her out on a date. 

·                    Get an old-fashioned box of chocolate and tell her you were thinking of her and how in the old days you used to sit in the car at the drive-in and kiss.

·                    Go out bowling with the whole family on a Saturday night; the kids will love it.

·                    Winter sports activities are a great North American pastime and you can also enjoy taking the family to a skating rink.

·                    Go to church or mosque or the synagogue with the family; a family that prays together, stays together.

·                    One of the greatest gifts you can give your partner is respect. When you respect, there is love, and when you have love, you have God, and you have everything.



Protecting your children from rapists and predators



Today nowhere is safe for a child to be on his or her own. Predators are not only men who lurk in bushes and strike at night, but individuals who are sometimes family members, teachers, and people in positions of authority. While men are usually the ones who commit crimes against children, there are also women who use children for their sick and depraved needs. 


Trust your instincts  


The first thing you and your children have to know and be reminded of constantly, is that a predator is not necessarily someone who only breaks into your house in the middle of the night and steal your belongings and rape and murder the family, but could also be:

·                    that nice amiable delivery boy who regularly delivers your groceries and have seen your children,

·                    an uncle or grandfather or cousin who is familiar with your children,

·                    a neighbor who always is kind and friendly,

·                    a complete stranger who has now surfaced and spending a lot of time in the open playing with your kids, or 

·                    someone who cuts lawns in the neighborhood and has now knocked on your door to start putting his plan into action.


Whether your children are boys or girls, they should all be talked to and told what to look out for. Most of all, they should trust their instinct. Instill in them the following mantra: 


(a)                that they should not get into anyone’s vehicle, no matter how well they know the person; not even a family member can okay this except for the parents,

(b)               they should NOT go with an uncle or male relative to look for a missing animal, no matter how persuasive the relative is and how much the child trusts him,

(c)                they should immediately report their suspicions to their parents if a male person in authority at school has tried to get them to go with him,

(d)               Do NOT be charmed by any strangers who come to the house and ask you to come with them. Child molestors are liars and con artists. They want to build up a friendship with you so that they can become a regular fixture in the house before they strike.

(e)                Report any strange behavior that a babysitter exhibits. Is she inappropriate and makes you feel uncomfortable?  

(f)                 Listen to your child who may be trying to tell you something,

(g)                Do not send your five-year-old little girl to the nearby shop; children have been abducted right from their own beds,

(h)                Talk to your children all the time and remind them to be careful,

(i)                  Make sure that whoever picks up the kids after school arrives on time and that they should not get into anyone else’s vehicle,

(j)                 Tell your child not to sit on anyone’s lap,

(k)               Let your children hear from your own lips tell grandpa and grandma that no one goes for rides in anyone’s car unless you personally say it is okay,.

(l)                  Don’t accept sweets and gifts from anyone and tell your parents if you are being approached by someone in the family who makes you feel uncomfortable.

(m)              Trust your instincts about people you meet and never spend that quarter in your wallet your mother has given you to make a phone call if you are in danger.