Dec 20, 2012

When you love too much





A relationship geared for the sole purpose of pleasing one person only is bound to fail as it is unbalanced and not based on love and companionship, but fear. The woman is needy and wants to be with him all the time. She is afraid of another woman on the scene. She knows him for a short time but feels desperate when he is on the phone to someone else. A man is the centre of her universe. She must always have one and will do anything to keep him even if she demeans herself in the process. She operates in the mistaken belief that if she does everything for him, he will stay with her. She does not want him to participate in his weekly poker games with the boys; she wants to know who is on the telephone calling him. What she in fact does is alienate the man who thinks her a pushover and still takes advantage of her generosity. She allows herself to be defined by a man and is surprised when he leaves her. 


Signs of a desperate woman

·         A woman who mistakes sex for love and gives in to the man whenever he wants it; whether she is in the mood or not. She is too afraid to say no because she believes if she does not get it on with him he will see her as being frigid and lose him.
·         A woman who caters to a man who is uncaring and when he cannot get his way becomes rude and insults her. She feels hurt but instead of discussing the situation and setting down the terms for a relationship, she keeps it all inside and suffers in silence.
·         A woman who says nothing to the man when he comes home late every night and who has little interaction with her.
·         A woman who is so desperate for the affections of a man that she will abandon her friends because he asks her to.  He is jealous of her friends, yet makes no effort to have a relationship with her.
·         A woman who puts a man’s goals first and let her own dreams flounder.
·         A woman who is forced to do things against her will and is pushed by a partner into unsavoury sexual acts.
·         A woman who does not love herself and waits for others to define who she is.

Dec 19, 2012

Why happiness is important for a long and healthy life





Happiness is a state of mind and people who are happy generally live longer than those who have many regrets and are always feeling low. A study involving nuns indicate that at the age of 85, 90% of the nuns with a cheerful background or history were still alive compared to just 54% of the least cheerful. To be happy means you feel light and free rather than congested and blocked up psychologically. A person who is happy embraces life and is anxious for the day to begin whereas an unhappy person feels morbid and solemn and drags you down with them, not intentionally but nevertheless. A person who is constantly dark and morbid is hard to be around; you feel under pressure to cheer him up; feeling bright and cheery makes for a pleasant environment.


Happiness and optimism

·         The most important reason why happiness is important is that happy and positive feelings can change the chemical make-up of our bodies, and produce chemicals which enhance immunity and cell repair. 

·         People who are optimistic get what they want as they constantly look for opportunities; people who are depressed do not believe in achieving anything. Optimists make lemonade out of lemons. They bounce back fast after a set-back. Their happiness is in line with their optimistic attitude. Consequently, they have a wholesome and happy life.

·         Someone who generates good cheer and sees the bright side in everything is more likely to attract a fun-loving individual into his life rather than someone who constantly mopes and feels depressed. 


Luck and virtue

There is a link between ‘doing good’ and feeling good. When you are happy and healthy you become generous and want to enlighten others and share what you know. You are positive. You are patient and kind. You create a ripple effect in the pool which spreads wider and wider and benefits everyone. Did you know that there is a link between luck and virtue? Think about it.

Dec 17, 2012

Are you a hoarder with an over-cluttered house?




Have you been reported by a neighbor or threatened with the police as your property and grounds present a health and fire hazard to others? Is it hard for you to part with things? Is every little gift and item from family and friends stuffed in a drawer somewhere over the years until there is no more space in your house and you are a victim of your own illness? Hoarding is an illness. Do you want to change your behavior and not be a victim? It is not an easy disorder to overcome, but with time and treatment it can be done.


Excessive collection of items over the years
According to the Mayo Clinic most victims do not accept the fact that they are hoarders and do not believe that there is anything the matter with them and that their behavior is normal. They cry and have anxiety when you suggest that excessive hoarding is a disorder and that they need treatment. Usually they have collected an excessive amount of items over the years and are unable to give things away or discard them. Their homes are stacked with clutter such as pots and pans in the sinks, dirty dishes, pizza boxes, old wrappers, rotten food, and the rooms are piled up with boxes, furniture and old newspapers from the fifties. You can virtually fill several trucks to remove all the stacked-up contents of the home. For those hoarders who also collect animals, there are usually dozens of pets who are being neglected and live in unsanitary conditions; some with matted hair and skin conditions and even some animals which have died.


Hoarding an obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD)
Vets or family members are usually the first to spot signs of animal hoarding when pet owners seek help for their sick or injured animals. If someone in your family has difficulty discarding things and saves old bottles or boxes of clothes and unable to either throw out what he or she does not need, the time for a visit to the doctor is due. Hoarding usually starts from a young age and symptoms are more severe later in life if the person is left untreated. Consult a mental health provider as soon as you can. Where health and safety is an issue you may also need to contact local authorities such as the police, fire, public health or animal welfare agencies.