Feb 21, 2012

Is your pickiness holding you back from having a lasting relationship?


We all know two or three friends with whom we have gone to school together, graduated, parted to start our different journeys and never lost complete touch. In our forties now, some of those couples have got married and had children, some have been married and divorced, and some maintain that they are still looking and have still not found the right person yet. The irony is that those very people who say they have not found the right one yet, have probably had the most attributes and qualities to have found a good partner. What then is the problem? Why are they still single and lonely? What is the new excuse now? Nobody seems to be good enough. No one makes it past the dinner drinks. When the last sip is taken they are already ruing the next day and thinking of what a bother it is.


Getting a grip


·                    If you are happy with your single life and truly don’t want a partner, and mean it, perhaps you are telling the truth and you do not have to read articles on subjects you secretly want to know about.

·                    Maybe you are even aware of your situation and are trying to fix it. Have you spoken to a psychologist? Do you dread the thought of a man in your life? Is there some past history which you should look into that is holding you back?

·                    Have you been in a relationship with a man that you really liked and wanted to be part of his life, and he left you, and you still don’t understand what happened? Deep down you know.

·                    Do you have unrealistic expectations? Do you want a man to wait on you hand and foot? Do you play games and withhold sex if you can’t get what you want? This is a favorite tactic of some women; they feel powerful when they get the upper hand.


News for you


Men know instinctively when they meet a woman for the first time what she gives up; meaning, is she a first-night kisser, is she anxious to be liked, is she desperate, does she put out on the first date, or is she cool and slow and easy and don’t take things for granted until they’ve been proven to her. Some of these reasons are why many people are in failed relationships and many too have not yet said marital vows. It is all right to be vulnerable; it means you do not know everything. The best way forward is to make a list of what you truly fear, see a psychologist, and then prepare a positive life plan which includes having a man in your life. If you come across desperate, men will sense that and take off. Remember, they are human beings too and have their fears.


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