Signs that your relationship might be in trouble

It is not a pleasant thing to write articles about infidelity and what to do about it, but if you can save someone from making a mistake, or help someone move on, it is well worth it. If you are currently in a relationship and your partner is acting strange, it may be that he is feeling guilty about his actions. If the following occurs, you have grounds to be concerned.

Signs that your relationship is in trouble

·                    Your guy comes home late from work every night, without explaining why he is late. Sometimes he only arrives home at midnight.

·                    He calls from work to say he is working on reports and will meet with some friends afterwards without giving you a reasonable explanation.

·                    He does not seem very interested in what you are doing and does not miss your attention.

·                    He’s bought mouthwash – something he has never done before – and goes out by himself.

·                    He says he has work to do at the office and may be home as late as midnight. When you call his office he is not there.

·                    He does not seem interested in having sex with you anymore and spends more time on his and with his buddies.

·                    He now wants to wash his own shirts and underwear.

·                    He comes home with pornography.

·                    He downloads porn at work and has a stash of pornography you discovered in a special folder on the internet.

·                    You feel that he has cooled towards you.

·                    He claims he has erectile dysfunction, but does not want to do anything about it.

·                    He has stopped buying you gifts.

·                    He no longer asks for your opinion.

Only you know your partner. Is he acting unusual? It is better at this point to ask him if you are right about your suspicions. Surely, no one wants to stay on with someone who has lost interest, and it is better to know the truth. If he has not lost interest in the relationship, it will do both of you good to speak to an expert to deal with what seems to be a troubled way to live. Usually friends of the couple can tell at a glance if something is wrong; ask your best friend what she thinks – then trust your instinct to do what you have to do.

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Entering the dating world in your sixties

When you’ve lived sixty years you have a lifetime of experience and have tasted almost all the opposites in life; love and hatred, happiness and sadness, selfishness and selflessness, good and evil, and there is nothing that is new to you or that you haven’t heard before. A woman who is on her own at sixty more likely does not want to be alone. She has lost her mate or she is divorced and the prospect of being alone is a daunting one. Who is going to want her, she asks herself. Who would find her attractive? What does one do at this time in life on a first date? She would rather hide under the table than answer the question. Still, it does not have to be so. It’s all a matter of perspective and how you look at it.

Looking and feeling ten years younger

Today sixty is the new fifty and a woman of sixty is still very much sexually active and desirable. According to recent articles in the U.K. the home care for seniors report that there is increased sexual activity. In fact, it has been found that seniors have unprotected sex and are less responsible than their children. But how does someone who at sixty has not been really outgoing, has not sharpened up on the latest in technoogy, does not know how to use the internet, find herself a man? She wouldn’t know how to approach it or even how to make the first move. At thirty you can handle rejection; at sixty it is difficult. You balk at the suggestion of friends who tell you to post your photo on an online dating site. You didn’t do it when you were young; it is almost laughable to think that you would want to do it now.

Be prepared for the unknown

However, if you were in a supermarket picking out apples, and they rolled from the shelf and a man with a silver mane helping his daughter with the grandchild came over and helped pick up the apples, and he flashed you a smile and something inside you stirred, that might be the start of something nice. You might consider it then, wouldn’t you? A friendship? A walk in the park? Watching a baseball game? All these things and more can happen. The question is; are you ready if it should happen out of the blue? Would you even recognize that you are being offered a gift?

Keeping young at heart

There are some very attractive women in their sixties who can still teach a younger woman a trick or two. It’s not all about looks. It’s about spirit and love, companionship. It’s about wanting to know more about the other person. It’s about friendship. Can you hold each other’s interests for two hours just talking on the porch? Is it stimulating and also a little arousing? If you are ready to meet that man, you will attract him to you. Don’t think on it. Just farm it out to the universe and let it go. In the meantime, don’t wait around the house. Get involved in the community. Work with children. Throw out those old cardigans and outdated pants and get yourself a new wardrobe. Play with your grandchildren. Get a bike and go out riding. Treat yourself and a friend to lunch. Volunteer to help patients at the local hospital. Talk to strangers if they should come up to you. The man you are waiting for may be one of them.

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Fiction writing tips

When  a fiction writer sits down to pen a new novel, a lot of things have already been taken into account, such as the best time of the day to write, considering the season, a time when it is quieter – if you are near a main road – and when there is little noise or traffic – even the weeks and months when he will not be able to write. This is the first thing to decide; how many weeks or months to devote to the project, and how to divide up that time so that you get the writing and other duties done. On a personal note, this writer has taken off almost a year for a breather after her tenth novel, Joonie, and this is a prelude before starting the eleventh novel. A fiction writer is an artist, a word colorist, a challenger.

Understanding the writing mind

Writers have peculiar habits in that they have learned to cope with hours on the keyboard by smoking cigarettes, drinking coffee, going for a quick walk to unclog the brain, or whatever other habit they have arrived at for maximum euphoria. There is joy at just the sheer arrangement of words. Still, the writing process is not easy. It is a solitary job; it is only you and the page in front of you. You are the judge, the jury, and the eliminator. You will cut a sentence or even a paragraph if it doesn’t resonate. When a writer is busy working it is almost a cruel to interrupt. Good writing takes time, patience, endurance, and the ability to make cuts – just like a director in a movie – if it serves the plot.

Good habits to employ

·                    Do you like the beach or the boardwalk a better place to write than at your desk? Laptops make things easy for a writer today, and you can easily write where it is most comfortable for you, even from the back seat of your car.

·                    Try and write at the same time every day. Spend at least an hour or more if you can afford the time.

·                    Don’t write if you are not feeling well; you will in all likelihood scrap what you have written. Take a nap and come back to it the following day. If you are like me, you will feel guilty for not utilizing that time. Definitely don’t write if you have a headache.

·                    Don’t force your writing. If the words have temporarily dried up, take a break. Water the lawn or go for a walk.

·                    Whatever you do, do not tell us what the story is about; let us see it unfold.

·                    Write about what you know as you will write with passion and also have more to write about.

·                    When editing your piece, cut out all those little gems – darlings they call it in the industry – you think are so great.

·                    Writing is about reading and rewriting, and reading other people’s work can be very inspirational.

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